“ They should make a device that turns books into movies. Then I would read all the time. ”
Charles (via david)
This made me cry a little on the inside…
Why some women don't like porn
gauntlet:
1. The vast majority of porn is made for a male audience. It depicts male fantasies and focuses on male pleasure. Female viewers aren’t acknowledged as an audience.
2. Mainstream porn is often unrealistic and divorced from situations in which everyday women experience sex. It’s also increasingly focused on sex acts that aren’t normative. A simple example: anal sex is standard in today’s porn, but an awful lot of women aren’t so keen on butt sex (and when you consider that in porn butt sex is usually portrayed as painful or cruel, it’s not surprising).
3. The performers in mainstream porn can be alienating and/or unappealing to women. Fake tits, blond hair, no cellulite, no pubic hair… Porn actresses can make women feel self conscious about their bodies. They may also find it hard to empathise with the female stars, which can make watching porn less appealing. And male porn stars can be seriously unattractive or downright creepy.
4. Mainstream porn can have an element of sexism or misogyny involved e.g. the reality sites where women are “tricked” into sex and derided. Even the language of porn (”slut, bitch, whore”) is not encouraging to women who enjoy sex. It upholds the old dichotomies of virgin/whore; women are simultaneously valued and despised because they have sex.
5. There’s still plenty of uncertainty about where porn fits into a relationship. A lot of women feel threatened by their man’s use of porn. There’s a concern that fantasy will make reality less appealing.
6. Some women are concerned that porn is warping men’s idea of good sex, making them expect sex acts that may be unusual or demeaning or unpleasurable for the woman. They feel it misleads men into thinking women will act or think a certain way, one that doesn’t reflect reality.
From Ms Naughty
I actually like some porn. But I think this is important for men to read, and to consider in relation to their gfs’ dislike or uncomfortability with their porn habits.
gauntlet:
snickerdoodle:
lovepuppy:
ellebelle:whateverlolawants:
“There’s a lot of mythology about what women want more: a good guy or a bad guy. The secret is knowing when to dabble in each. If you’re too straitlaced, you’re dull. And if you’re truly bad, you’re probably self-absorbed. What everyone really needs is to be loved, and a good guy is more likely to offer you that.”
- Penn Badgley
(Instyle)
Smart. Hot. *sigh*
Ogle. Enjoy. Have a good weekend : )
Truth.
Plus, super hot.
“ I don’t want to move to a city where the only cultural advantage is being able to make a right turn on a red light. ”
Alvy Singer (Woody Allen) on Los Angeles (via caughtupinsanity)(via chainchewinggum) (via peterwknox)
California, okay, I can wrap my head around nice beaches and pleasant weather. Los Angeles? It just seems like an overabundance of insincerity.
“ When a couple was “going steady” in the 1950s, the young man might have let his girlfriend wear his Varsity team sweater or given her his fraternity pin. But the 1960s swept aside those rituals. Now the Facebook link has become a publicly-recognized symbol of a reasonably serious intent short of being engaged or moving in together. ”
If It’s Facebook, it’s love (via thesemodernsocks) (via allisonweiss)
I’m always tickled that being “facebook official” is now an important stage in most college-aged relationships. Not so much about it being absurd - because it is a really exciting and special point in a relationship - but in how nobody could have predicted it as little as five years ago and how strange this must all seem to my parents.
(via gregbrown)
(via sarahchristine)
I haven’t been in a serious relationship since I joined Facebook, but my instinct is to always leave my relationship status blank. Not because I don’t care, but because history shows that break-ups render me a mess, and the last thing I want in the midst of one is to make an announcement to my entire broader social circle that my heart’s been trampled on. I’d rather just crawl up in a hole, watch trash TV, bawl my eyes out to my friends, and ignore the world.
A bit hard to stick with that conviction in the flush of new love, though.
(via miss-r)
Actually, the way that the BF originally let me know that he was ready for “a relationship” with me was to request the “in a relationship with” status from me on facebook.
I was giddy. I felt kind of ridiculous, but I was still giddy. It’s weird to think that technology has taken the place of varisty jackets and pins… but kind of nice, too. One no longer has to wonder whether their significant other’s friends knows about them, it’s all out in the open.
Unless of course, like miss-r, one is emotionally prudent. Though, I must say, when I went through a facebook-publicized breakup with a former serious boyfriend, the backlash was not anywhere near what I expected.
A Break
I don’t want to get into details for the sake of his privacy and mine, but the BF and I are on a quasi-(meaning we haven’t broken off all communication) 1-week break.
I’m just kind of not quite okay with it. I’m having a hard time. And I’m really skeptical of breaks in general.
Does anyone know of a couple that took a break and actually got back together successfully?
I need some encouragement.
